Yesterday Sept. 17th (Payday)
The YYZ-SAN sector ended up a smoothie. The seat belt sign stayed off the entire five hour flight. Well... except below 10,000 feet. I sold two books. Both to flight attendants. We had a book signing session at FL 360. One had a boyfriend totally obsessed with airplanes, but unfortunately his colour blindness put a kibosh to his dream.
I had a meeting today regarding me teaching meteorology. Air Canada wants to change the image they had with a few previous courses. How shall I put it diplomatically?Showing up for ground school Monday morning at Air Canada is similar in coming from a 'farm team' and finally making it to the NHL. The only glitch was the coach was a figure skater. They (AC) want to change things and I hope I'm part of the coaching team.
Today, the F/O didn't seem to be really chatty so Captain Doug went into the photographer mode. Here's my art collection...I call it, "Airbus Parts." Enjoy the gallery.
Maybe if I send this to Ottawa I can sell it to one of the galleries for an unfathomable amount of money? I'll just add some artsy descriptions to each pic. :) :) :)
Art whisking at 500 mph (remember to click on the photo to indulge further - heck I'm even talking like them).
The two main Airbus instruments. The PFD (Primary Flight Display) and the ND (Navigation Display) Both rumoured to cost about $100, 000 each.
The tray table is stowed. Later you will see it use.
The flight deck door and the "J" class washroom. During pre 9/11 days our flight deck door would open now and again with a confused passenger thinking it was the lavatory. Don't have to worry about that anymore. :)
Located above our heads. If you are using this rope you are not having a good day (think Tarzan). During my initial A340 training (15 years ago) the instructor knew how to tie a noose. If you were having a "brain fart" you could feel the noose near your neck. How's that for intimidation. (It was all done in fun - I think) :)
Captain Doug's approach charts held up by a bungie cord. No the chord is not Airbus certified.
Need I say more!
You are probably thinking...this toilet is not "art." It will probably fetch me the most. :)
Seriously, the toilet is a main component of any airliner. If you think not, wait until it goes unserviceable. What are airplane toilets called? Lavatories.
Part of the on board library. We have dedicated people who travel the entire fleet updating these books. I bet a Ipod touch could do the same and cut down hugely on weight. Oops, I'm digressing.
They are not called fuses on airplanes, but circuit breakers.
This device better not be lit when we land. Or else the flight attendant may be visiting the ramp in a hurry.
That big thick orange book is the MEL (Minimum Equipment List)
Both pilots and maintenance consult it when there is a snag. It sits behind the captain's seat and weighs about 25-30 pounds. What was I saying about an Ipod touch?
Like the toilet this is a "no go" item. The flight deck garbage bag. It always goes on the left armrest of the first officer's seat. Some new flight attendants may place it on the captain's armrest, but it is quickly moved. It's part number is the "PS-4029."
No I'm not kidding.
This is where the captain stows the flight attendant list. This equipment list must be filled out on every flight.
Up/Down with a little wheel? Yes, it's the landing gear lever.
Some captain's jest, if the F/O does not want to play along... then the captain will make them a "hydraulic engineer" i.e put the gear up and down, moves the flaps and don't touch anything else. :)
If you look at the picture just below, it's the captain's armrest.
This is how we set our personal settings for the very expensive Airbus armrest. Captain Doug is a C-3 guy. I've seen some with whacky settings. The worst is K-9.
I make the joke, a dog has been flying...get it? K-9 (canine).
An expensive armrest to work the joystick.
Mechanical checklist above the glare shield.
This is "plan B" in getting the gear down. Again, one is not having a good day.
Center pedestal with datalink paper. I called up Toronto's ATIS for effect.
How did I do?
Part of the center console. The park brake, gravity gear extension and the datalink.
When I took this photo, the flight attendant told me I was very creative.
Maybe I should sell these photos to an art gallery? :)
Engines 1 and 2.
No Captain Doug is not into voyeurism. This is the peep hole through the flight deck door to the galley. Years ago when on the A340 some pilot with a sense of humour (yes, there are some) put an official looking plaque on the door.
"Caution, flight attendants may appear thinner than they actually are."
It said a lot on the overseas flights. :)
The tray table in use with Captain Doug's tea.
The hats are placed on the back wall. Guess which one is mine? You're right, the one to fit a bigger head. On the oversea's flights, where there can be four hats, there is an unwritten rule as to where each one goes.
The Airbus joystick and the hand tiller to the left. The tiller moves the nose wheel to maneuver the airplane on the ground. Even though the F/O has a tiller, the captain the taxis the airplane. The conspicuous red button disconnects the autopilot.
The rudder pedals. The brakes are operated on the top portion of the pedals.
I hope you enjoyed my gallery called "Airbus Parts!"